But who is suffering the most here, who will suffer the most in the long run if you choose to opt out, are you and the child. I'm looking into getting all my child support back. Revenge is a natural, if unpretty, human emotion. I assume on some level that you want your ex to pay—not just financially—for her deception. I was with my ex-fiance on and off for 4 years. I Found Out my Child Is Not Biologically Mine. Her excuse was 'I just said I was pregnant, never said the baby was yours." Another way to prevent getting this page in the future is to use Privacy Pass. They believe they are allowed to do whatever they want and deserve to "get away with it"!IF the situation were the other way around, she would've kick her husband out of the house and marriage AND take every last pennies he has! I'm sure many here would be grateful to read an update how it turns out. However, I have forgiven her and will protect my wife's honour. Im in UK so not clear on what laws are here. Think about what you want from this before you take any action. The men reveal how they dealt with the devastating revelation on an anonymous online platform (. ) I will provide for him financially as a single dad would, but I need to know what my obligations are (I’m in the UK). We had three children – now 16, 12 and seven – and in the early years my wife stayed at home to mind them. It turns out the boy I have been taking care of for the last four years isn’t mine.
For the past seven years you have accepted this little boy as your own and he has loved you as a father. last year she got pregnant and i was so happy cause i was gonna have a baby girl. The test is designed to prove to you that she loves you but can it do that? No half measures.
If you are at an office or shared network, you can ask the network administrator to run a scan across the network looking for misconfigured or infected devices. You will need very good judgment in order to decide what to do next and our intelligence can be hampered by fear, suspicion and a need for protection. Before embarking on a DNA test, perhaps it would be worth talking this over thoroughly with someone who is grounded and trustworthy. Very likely. ", "Found out that my newborn baby isn't mine three weeks ago after spending a month with him all I want to do is f*** off and never come back.
I think I can only believe her when I have the absolute proof that our seven-year-old is mine and not some other man’s. We all make mistakes. I will push for the biological dad to be informed, but I will leave the final decision to the mother. Cloudflare Ray ID: 5ecb98296c9d2c26 I've made up my mind that I am her daddy no matter what.
We’re also donating $5 of every ticket price to Share The Dignity so grab your friends and come along to share the love and laughs, get your tickets here. First things first, I will continue to be in the child’s life. One facet that worries me is the grandparents, this will tear my mother into pieces, I’d rather she didn’t know. Your screen name should follow the standards set out in our. But then you'd have poisoned the well with the two of them.
I am leaning towards telling my son, but not right now. They can't. See the update in the original post for the conclusion I am currently at. Completing the CAPTCHA proves you are a human and gives you temporary access to the web property. The idea of a 4-year-old attempting to process that—and looking for you—is heartbreaking. It’s an ugly and unfair situation, but your absence doesn’t make it any better for anyone, especially not for you or the child.
My guess is she was already pregnant when you hooked up. '”, "I know this baby isn't mine," one man revealed. “After five years I found out the child was not mine,” the man wrote. How to Find out if the Child Is Really His. She cheated on me at a party. These men have 'adopted' the children into their hearts and are committed to being their dads. 0. Couple counselling can help you to have a thorough discussion and it might be helpful to have a professional and neutral person to bear witness to your story – see familytherapyireland.com for qualified couple therapists. I am on the birth certificate as the father. Because she's my daughter. Will another person feel differently? The rest will play out as it may. Would I have liked to have known who he is?
I'll tell you this, though: if a man did for me what you did (and may yet do) for this boy, he might not be my father in fact, but he'd be my Dad indeed. My ex and I have been divorced for a couple years now and I have had my doubts about whether or not my son is biologically mine. "After five years, I found out the child wasn't mine. I am driven mad by it. Eight years ago my wife went back to work in her old firm and she has changed a lot.
He’s my little man. This father/son love and connection is put up for scrutiny if you do the test: will you disown him if you discover he is not yours? Problem I want to have a DNA test done on my youngest son (7). ", "No one knows but me and my son's mother that I'm not the father. Commenting on The Irish Times has changed. I think financially though things changed. Im obviously going to get a second just to check. But honestly thank each and every one of you for the comments. They found out the mom was buying drugs with the $ anyhow. I'm 17.
About 99% of the time, it is strongly recommended that the mother of the child be involved in the process and all outcomes need to be thoroughly discussed. Some men were keeping the secret for the sake of their families. "Just waiting on this income tax cheque and I'm leaving her!". Consult an attorney to find out anything you might be on the hook for. I get why you’ve withdrawn from the child and likely his mother. Unless she's dunning him for child support, getting a lawyer involved to make his non-paternity official can't be great for the dynamic.
“Her excuse was ‘I just said I was pregnant, I never said the baby was yours. Great advice, thank you. In this way your mental chatter can be challenged and you can get some sense of whether you are behaving in a reasonable way or whether you are suffering from insecurity and doubt. No.
But the essence of all moral systems is to do to others what you'd want done to you, so I suggest this as a starting point.
I do think that in either case you should have that conversation with the mother. Ironically, it turns out that she's the outlier. The mother—my girlfriend—has to back-pay me, yet that doesn’t make me feel any better. Now ive been seeing the child regularly since his mother and I split, i'm "his dad" he stays at mine, spends weekends with me etc. This name will appear beside any comments you post. If you're not already a Mamamia member, sign up (it's easy, we promise). ", Property News: A stunning Gordon's Bay home with an epic ocean outlook - domain.com.au. And what of your other children – certainly the 16-year-old is probably clued in enough to see what is going on and this puts the whole family at risk. ", "I don't want to get a DNA test done on my child, because I'm scared it'll tell me she's not really mine.
I think just keeping the status quo is not good advice . “If I leave, all three of us are screwed.”. Do you think you'd have a good life if you just kept the status quo?
Either way, action needs to be taken to either boost your self-confidence or/and to support your relationship. Doubts about a child's paternity can be stressful. It’s probably never a good idea to snoop in someone’s diary – you’re almost guaranteed to find out something that you really didn’t need to know or get your feelings hurt. I got broken. “I have tried to tell myself that my wife is not betraying me but I think I can only believe her when I have the absolute proof that our son is mine”. ", "My girlfriend is having a baby in 10 weeks. Sorry, im rambling now. Yesterday I appeared in court to have a DNA test result read. That is a man. Maybe I am wrong, but this feels very much like it did when she had the affair and, because I am away a lot myself, I can’t check on what she is doing. We had a DNA test done and it was confirmed, 99.999% he is not mine. ", "After five years, I found out the child wasn't mine. ", "After 10 years, my wife told me my kid isn't mine. The award-winning podcast Mamamia Out Loud is doing their first live show.
Dude there’s a guy out there who probably doesn’t know he has a kid and may want a relationship with his kid too. The other is one of the finest titles available to a man. ", "Found out the little girl I was raising isn't mine when I found my girlfriend's journal. Please subscribe to sign in to comment. ", "Pretty sure this kid isn't mine, but why do I still want to be with her? I wouldn't spend too much on a lawyer. Your IP: 185.63.46.193 How can I stop children from playing in the courtyard of my apartment complex? ", "I have a child tell me he loves me so much. Watch the brand new season of Condor now on Stan. "After ten years my wife told me my kid wasn't mine," one man wrote. Educate yourself as much as possible. Especially the mother.
“Her excuse was ‘I just said I was pregnant, I never said the baby was yours.
Give it a go, Dated Dalkey house with sea view potential for €1.6m, Save for your retirement the right way with a responsible investment approach, Chris Ryder obituary: reporting during Troubles made journalist IRA target, Frank Bough obituary: Unruffled broadcaster combined geniality with professionalism, Margaret Ann Nolan obituary: Appeared in Goldfinger and Carry On films, Frequently asked questions about your digital subscription, Specially selected and available only to our subscribers, Exclusive offers, discounts and invitations, Explore the features of your subscription, Carefully curated selections of Irish Times writing, Sign up to get the stories you want delivered to your inbox, An exact digital replica of the printed paper. This should be the top comment. ", "My girlfriend doesn't think I know out daughter isn't mine. Good advice and yeah i'll be getting legal advice on this. I'd walk away, but financially you might already be on the hook for child support. If you say nothing you’re just as bad as if she knew and said nothing to you.
I love him now, that bond is there and the thought of him, for one second, wondering where I’ve gone breaks me into pieces. My wife doesn't know that I found out she isn't mind. ", "I know the baby isn't mine... Just waiting on this income tax check then I'm leaving her!
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